If only we had known. If only we had understood earlier the weight of time, the fickleness of fate, the depth of love, and the unrelenting hand of loss. If only we had foreseen the burdens, the betrayals, the disappointments, and the battles that life would throw at us. If only we had known, would we have made different choices? Would we have been stronger, wiser, or perhaps more cautious? Or would we have still walked the same path, knowing that some things are inevitable, no matter how much we try to rewrite fate?
Life is a master illusionist, a grand storyteller who reveals its chapters only when we are ready—or sometimes, when we are least prepared. It throws us into battles we never signed up for, into storms we never saw coming, into moments where we are forced to question our very existence. There are days when the silence in our minds is louder than a battlefield, when our past haunts us like a shadow refusing to detach.
We grow up believing in fairy tales, in the idea that goodness is rewarded, that hard work guarantees success, that love, once found, remains unshaken. And then, life smirks at our innocence and throws reality at us—hard and without warning. We wake up to realize that the world does not move with justice in its hands. That effort does not always translate into results, that the strongest bonds can break, that the people we love can become strangers, that the ones we trust the most can inflict wounds deeper than a dagger ever could.
What if we had known? Would we have been better prepared for the disappointments? The moments when love turns cold, when friendships dissolve into mere memories, when family becomes nothing more than a title with no meaning? The pain of singlehood and the struggles of marriage—two extremes that both come with their own set of battles. The single feel the weight of loneliness pressing down like an unbearable silence, wondering if love is a myth or if they are simply unlucky. And those in marriages sometimes wish they could breathe again, that the love they once cherished didn’t feel like a cage now.
The world does not prepare us for the heartbreak of losing a loved one, the slow ache of missing someone who will never return. It does not prepare us for the crushing weight of grief, for the days when the absence of a voice is so loud it drowns out everything else. We are not told that no amount of strength can make loss hurt any less. We only learn when we are thrown into the abyss of sorrow, gasping for something to hold onto.
Mental health—perhaps one of the most untold battles of all. We are raised to be strong, to push through, to suppress pain, to wear masks so that the world does not see our cracks. But inside, how many are breaking? How many walk through life smiling while their hearts bleed? How many nights are spent in silent battles, where the mind turns into an enemy, whispering cruel things that no one else hears?
And then, there is the weight of expectation. Society, family, culture—they all place invisible chains on us. Be this. Do that. Follow this path. We live chasing standards that were never ours to begin with. We sacrifice our dreams for the approval of others, suppress our voices to fit into molds that were never meant for us. We watch time slip through our fingers, realizing too late that we never truly lived for ourselves.
If only we had known. If only we had understood that happiness is not a destination, but a fleeting moment we must learn to catch before it disappears. That love is not about possession but about presence. That some people are only chapters in our lives, not the whole book. That sometimes, we have to let go, not because we want to, but because holding on is far more painful. That healing is not linear, and some wounds will always leave scars.
Would life have been different? Maybe. Or maybe some lessons can only be learned through experience, through fire, through pain. Maybe wisdom is not something given, but something earned in the trenches of life. Maybe the beauty of life lies in its unpredictability, in the fact that we do not know what comes next.
But if we could go back, if we could whisper to our younger selves, we would tell them this—love deeply but know when to walk away. Chase dreams, not validation. Value peace over popularity. Be kind, not just to others, but to yourself. And most of all, know that life will break you, but it will also give you moments of breathtaking beauty. Hold onto those. Because, in the end, it is those moments that make the journey worth it.
#Puobabangna
By Victor Raul Puobabangna Plance from Eggu in the Upper West Region of Ghana 🇬🇭
