Daily Capsule series — You Have Nothing to Prove
“You don’t have to stay where you shrunk just because people remember who you were there.”
Let’s talk about growth.
Not the kind where people cheer for you and clap loudly. Not the one where the change is obvious, like losing weight or getting a new job.
I’m talking about the quiet kind of growth. The messy kind. The kind where you just start becoming someone different without even realizing it at first.
I once found myself in a space where I didn’t feel like I belonged anymore. The jokes weren’t funny anymore. The conversations started to feel shallow. The people I used to confide in? I no longer felt safe opening up to them.
At first, I thought maybe I was being too sensitive. But deep inside, I knew something was shifting. My heart wanted more. My mind was tired of small talk. My soul was aching for peace. So I started pulling back. Little by little, I changed. I stopped texting as often. I stopped showing up just to be seen. I started choosing quiet. I started choosing boundaries.
And guess what?
People noticed. But not in the way I hoped.
I started hearing things like:
“You’ve changed.” “You think you’re better than us now?” “You’ve become too quiet.” “You’re no longer fun.”
Have you ever experienced that?
Where people complain about the very change that’s keeping you sane?
It made me question myself for a while.
Was I being fake? Was I abandoning people? Was I acting brand new?
But after many sleepless nights and long silent walks, here’s what I came to accept:
You don’t have to explain why you changed.
Not everyone will understand your healing. Not everyone will appreciate your silence. Not everyone will accept your boundaries.
And that’s okay.
Think about it. If you wore shoes that were two sizes too small for years, and one day you finally found a pair that fit you comfortably, would you apologize for no longer limping?
Growth is just like that.
Sometimes it looks like becoming quieter. Sometimes it looks like walking away. Sometimes it means losing people who only liked the version of you that never said “no.”
And here’s the tough part — people will talk.
They’ll whisper. They’ll wonder. They’ll make up their own stories.
But you do not owe them a press conference. You do not have to prove that your growth is valid.
Let them talk. Let them miss the old you. Let them sit with their discomfort.
Because growth isn’t always pretty.
Sometimes it’s lonely. Sometimes it hurts. Sometimes you cry not because you’re weak, but because you’re finally strong enough to let go.
It’s kind of like pruning a tree. You cut off certain branches not because you hate the tree, but because you want it to grow well.
You can still love people and not go back to the old you for their comfort. You can still care and keep your distance. You can still forgive and not reconnect.
Some people only loved the version of you that stayed small. The one that tolerated what you now speak up against. The one that accepted less because you didn’t yet know your worth.
Now that you’ve grown, they feel uneasy. But their discomfort is not your burden.
So let me say it again:
You don’t have to explain why you changed.
Change is necessary. Change is healthy. Change is brave.
It takes courage to walk away from what was familiar but draining. It takes strength to stop pretending you’re okay when you’re not. It takes wisdom to recognize that peace is more important than pleasing people.
So today, I want to ask you:
What are you still apologizing for? Whose comfort are you sacrificing your growth for?
You were not made to stay in places where your soul is shrinking. You were made to grow, stretch, evolve, and sometimes even surprise yourself.
Yes, people will say you’ve changed. But they won’t talk about the sleepless nights. They won’t talk about the tears. They won’t mention the silent battles you fought just to breathe again.
So stop explaining. You have nothing to prove.
Grow anyway.
Reflect with me:
Where have you changed, and who’s making you feel guilty for it? What would happen if you stopped apologizing and just kept going?
HERE’S YOUR REMINDER:
Not everyone needs a seat on your journey.
Not everyone will clap for your healing.
And that’s fine.
Just keep growing.
You have nothing to prove.
By Victor Raul Puobabangna Plance from Eggu in the Upper West Region of Ghana
#Puobabangna
