Daily Capsule series: You Have Nothing to Prove
“You are not too much. You were just offering your heart to someone who wasn’t ready to receive it.”
There is something deeply painful about feeling like you are too much for someone. Too loving. Too expressive. Too kind. Too present. You start to question yourself. You begin to wonder if you are difficult to love. And if you are not careful, you begin to shrink yourself just to fit into spaces that were never meant to hold the weight of your full heart.
I once gave my all to someone who simply could not hold it. Not because they were a bad person. But because they were not ready. My love confused them. My consistency overwhelmed them. My communication made them uncomfortable. And slowly, I started to believe that I was the problem.
I kept asking myself: “What am I doing wrong?” “Why do they seem distant?” “Why do I feel like I have to chase what should be mutual?”
It took me a while to realise that the issue was not me. The issue was that I was offering something deep to someone who only knew how to swim in shallow water. I was trying to speak the language of care to someone who had never learned how to listen.
It hurts, doesn’t it? When your love goes unappreciated. When your efforts feel invisible. When your heart starts to feel like a burden instead of a gift.
But here is what I have learned, and maybe you need to hear it too:
You are not hard to love.
You are not too much.
You are not asking for too much just because you want consistency, honesty, loyalty, effort, and peace. You are not asking for too much because you want someone who checks in, shows up, and treats your heart with care.
You are simply asking the wrong person.
And that is where the pain begins. When you keep pouring into someone who does not have the capacity, the readiness, or the maturity to meet you there.
It is like offering a three-course meal to someone who only came for a snack. They won’t appreciate the effort. They won’t see the beauty of your offering. They will leave, not because it wasn’t enough, but because it was more than they came for.
And when they leave, you start to feel rejected. You think maybe you are broken. Maybe you are too emotional. Maybe you need to hold back next time. But let me remind you of something simple and true:
The right people will never be overwhelmed by your love. They will not run from your truth. They will not get tired of your check-ins. They will not ignore your honesty. They will not make you feel like your kindness is annoying.
The right people will make room for your heart. They will appreciate it. They will protect it. They will honour it.
So if you are in a space right now where you are questioning yourself because someone could not receive your love, I want you to stop and breathe.
This is not the end of your story.
Your heart is not too heavy.
Your love is not too intense.
You just gave it to someone who was not ready. That is all.
Let them go. Let that situation go. Let the self-blame go. You do not have to fix yourself to become acceptable. You do not have to dim your light to be loved.
You have nothing to prove.
Love is not something you beg for. Love is not something you shrink for. Love is something you give freely, but only to those who know what to do with it.
So the next time someone walks away from your love, do not run after them. Do not start doubting your worth. Do not try to become less.
Instead, remind yourself: “I am not hard to love. They just were not ready.”
And then keep loving, but love wisely.
Let’s reflect for a moment:
Have you ever felt like you were too much for someone?
How long have you been apologising for your emotions?
Here is the truth:
You are not too much.
You are not hard to love.
And you have nothing to prove.
By Victor Raul Puobabangna Plance from Eggu in the Upper West Region of Ghana
#Puobabangna
